Showing posts with label shame. Show all posts
Showing posts with label shame. Show all posts

Aug 29, 2019

Troubled By Taffeta


"What did she say?” I asked Cathy while we were watching a television program. One of the main characters, a high school girl, had been ironing a dress and ruined it. Apparently one is not supposed to iron dresses made with taffeta.

"Taffeta"; replied Cathy.

"That's not a word!" I said, wondering if I had misunderstood what the person had said.

"Actually it is a word"; Cathy said as she looked surprised that I hadn't heard the word before.

"I know that's not a word!" I said grabbing my phone to look it up on my dictionary app.

"Actually IT IS a word"; Cathy said as she looked surprised that I hadn't used the word in a sentence or read it before.

I searched for in the dictionary and I discovered that apparently it is a real word and has been used since 1325.

The word taffeta means:
"a medium-weight or light-weight fabric of acetate, nylon, rayon, or silk, usually smooth, crisp, and lustrous, plain-woven, and with a fine crosswise rib effect. Any of various other fabrics of silk, linen, wool, etc., in use at different periods"

"Am I the only person who hasn't heard of or used the word "taffeta"?"; I thought to myself and set off to take a poll.

Several times over the next several weeks I randomly asked friends and loved ones if they had ever heard the word taffeta and ALL of them had; except for the stranger I asked who replied; "Yo no hablo ingles"

How is it I made it this far in life without hearing this word? Even as I type this blog spellcheck recognizes it as a real word!
 
While telling my dilemma to one of my daughters, she joined the rest of the world in letting me know that it was indeed a real word. I felt a little better when her husband said that he hadn't heard it before.

My latest was discovering that I all these years I had been spelling “doughnuts” wrong; I always spelled is as “donuts”!

So, how do you REACT when you don’t know something that “EVERYONE” else seems to know? Angry? Defensive? Explosive?

Well, at least I know what the word “circumlocution” means; do you? Oh you do? Never mind…

How do you FEEL when you don’t know something that “EVERYONE” else seems to know? Awkward? Left out? Stupid?

Do you withdraw or draw closer?

Do you take the opportunity to learn and to grow? Or do you use it as another reason to believe you don’t matter?

Just because we don’t know EVERYTHING doesn’t mean that what we do know isn’t important or valuable.

It’s amazing how quickly not knowing something can cause us to go into a tailspin; as though our validation comes only from others opinions of us.

When this happens; we need to look deeply at how we are allowing wrong thoughts to influence what we think about ourselves.

We need to let Jesus bring affirmation and validation in way that ONLY He can bring it.

We need to RUN to Him for validation, affirmation, and purpose.

We need to run to the Word of God to allow it to transform what we think to what God says about us.

The Word of God says:
“My thoughts are nothing like your thoughts,” says the Lord.
“And My ways are far beyond anything you could imagine.
For just as the heavens are higher than the earth,
so My ways are higher than your ways
and My thoughts higher than your thoughts. (Isaiah 55:8-9)

“How precious are Your thoughts about me, O God.
They cannot be numbered!
I can’t even count them;
they outnumber the grains of sand!
And when I wake up,
You are still with me!” (Psalm 139:17-18)

“Thank you for making me so wonderfully complex!
 Your workmanship is marvelous—how well I know it.… (Psalm 139:14)

“See how very much our Father loves us, for He calls us His children, and that is what we are!” (1 John 3:1)

Are you struggling with thoughts of rejection; and in need of affirmation and validation that you are loved?

I know that you may feel worthless at this moment and really need some encouragement and hope in your life. I know that nothing seems to be going right for you and you conclude that you need to quit. But don’t quit before God is done with your situation. He really can fix anything!

I know that right now all you might be feeling is sadness and you don’t see any way out of your current situation. I really do know; I, too, have been there a couple different times in at life. I know what it is like to struggle with wanting to end the anguish NOW and feeling that there is no hope. But there is HOPE that things can change. They really can; I promise you.

Have you had enough of what this world has to offer and want true freedom?

Someone is waiting to talk with you. Call either:
1-888-NEED HIM or 1-877-2GRAHAM (1-877-247-2426).

NOTE: “circumlocution” means: a roundabout or indirect way of speaking; the use of more words than necessary to express an idea.

All Scripture is from the New Living Translation, copyright © 1996, 2004, 2015 by Tyndale House Foundation. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers, Inc., Carol Stream, Illinois 60188. All rights reserved.

Nov 1, 2018

“Do You Want To Be Made Well?”


I have had numbness in my left foot (and sometimes also leg) since May 6, 2018. I know the date because it is the only time that I have left a hockey game due to a physical problem. I even played a game after dislocating my right shoulder in a game. Needless to say, my whole arm was numb for an entire period!

I was warming up before my game by skating around the rink and suddenly, my whole left leg went numb, and I was in extreme pain. I tried to “skate-it-off”, but I could barely make a full lap around the rink.

I left the rink, went into the locker room, changed into my street clothes, packed up my gear, and drove home.

When I arrived home, Cathy, out of concern, asked me why I was home so early. I explained the situation to her and because she saw that I was in pain (and because I had left early), she told me to take a shower and then she would take me to Urgent care. 

At Urgent Care, they gave me pain meds and sent me home…the next day I went to our primary doctor and to our favorite chiropractor; Dr. Joel.

After that, I have been doing everything I can to fix it including more chiropractic and weekly treatments from our favorite PT Kathy…All with no complete healing. And it has been almost six months!

Stating the obvious, I want to be healed because I don’t like having a numb foot, and because my outdoor hockey season is about to start.

Have you ever struggled with an illness or physical condition for a very long time that won’t go away?
 
I would like to invite you to get a Bible and READ John 5:1-16 and then read my observations…

“Bethesda” means “house of kindness”. The Pool of Bethesda is deep enough to swim in. Beneath the pool was a subterranean stream that would occasionally bubble up and disturb the waters.

Ancient people believed that the disturbance was caused by an angel who occasionally would come, stir up the waters, and whoever stepped into the pool first would be healed.

To us it is mere superstition, but it is the kind of belief that is all around the world today; especially people who are ignorant of the Word of God and by people who are desperate to be healed and will believe anything to get their healing.

One day Jesus was passing by the pool and noticed a man who was sick lying on a mat.

The man had been sick for 38 years! He had tried to get into the pool to be healed, but someone always gets into the pool before him.

He was been committed to the same plan every day to get his healing and it hadn’t worked because someone always got their healing as they got in the pool first. And he was still sick, broken, and he was frustrated

All of us as humans deal with brokenness: Broken bodies, relationships, dreams, spirits…all longing to be healed.

We fool ourselves by telling ourselves; “It’s no big deal…” Trying to get through life walking with a limp and keeping ourselves busy as we ignore the deep need we all have for healing

But if we are truly honest with ourselves, we too would like to just once be the first person in the pool, and THEN we would be healed.

We hear how others have gotten healed and set free, so we pursue our healing. We set out on a plan of action for how we will get healed…

Someday, THIS plan will work, you will see….

Some of us have given up on ever getting healed and so we put our focus on our children. If one plan doesn’t work we will try another. We will try harder, driver further, believe harder…

Or we work on something else like our career. We are constantly on the move; all in an attempt for us to get rid of the pain in our lives.

And, like the man on the mat, we never quite get into the waters to be healed. And what’s worse, we lose focus and can no longer see God even when He is standing next to us.

Verse 6 Tells us that Jesus (the Healer) passed by the pool. But, the man was too filled with discouragement to see Jesus. He was too focused on being frustrated because no one helped him. In fact, this man almost missed seeing the only One who could heal him.

Jesus asked a simple question: “DO YOU WANT TO BE MADE WELL?”

Why would Jesus ask that? Of course, he wanted to be made well! After all, he had been coming to the pool every day.

Sometimes we can get so used to the pain in our lives that we become a friend with it and it becomes part of who we are; even part of our identification.

Our pain becomes like a lizard on our shoulder: It irritates and hurts us all the time. It distracts us and prevents us from being truly free. It takes away a part of us.

AND YET, we don’t seem to be able to get rid of it and we treat it like it is our pet; not realizing that also pushes everyone away from us.

So, Jesus persisted with His question: “DO YOU WANT TO BE MADE WELL?” – “well”, “sound”, “whole” Do you REALLY want to be healed?

Verse 7 Look at how the man responded: “Sir, I have no man to put me into the pool when the water is stirred up; but while I am coming, another steps down before me.”

This man hadn’t listened to the question that Jesus asked him; “DO YOU WANT TO BE MADE WELL?”

It seems to me that this man wanted instead to form a committee to look into the problem; perhaps a committee to regulate who goes into the pool…A committee who will make sure that everyone gets their turn.

To me it seems that this man wants a ticket booth set up so we know when it is our turn or some other way to make sure that things are fair…THEN he will get his healing

Too often Jesus comes to us offering life; “If anyone thirsts, let him come to Me and drink. (John 7:37b)

And we respond by asking Him what He is going to do about injustice. Or by asking Him to fix the holes in the umbrella; instead of asking Him to stop the rain.

The man’s problem wasn’t just a physical problem; he had a heart condition. He was so focused upon himself. He was so focused on his plan that he couldn’t see the possibility for God to do something.

The healer Himself was present and all the man wanted was for Jesus to help him into the water; not to heal him another way.

Verse 8 Jesus responded to the man’s complaints; “Rise, take up your bed and walk.”

Verse 9 And immediately the man was made well! He took up his bed and walked.

NOTICE: Jesus didn’t help the man into the pool. He didn’t dialog about the situation. He didn’t analyze what was the solution. He healed the man.
 
Jesus came to set us free, not help us in our futile plans.

Jesus didn’t get the man a new job that paid better or get him a new mat. Or get him new friends that would help him get into the pool. Or ask the Father to send an angel to stir up the waters.

Jesus healed the man.

You see, Jesus came to deal with the sin problem as well as the physical lameness. Verse 14 we read that the man’s condition was due to sin. We don’t know what he did, but Jesus tells us IN THIS CASE, sin was the issue.

Jesus said to the man; “See, you have been made well. Sin no more, lest a worse thing come upon you.”

Jesus wants to do the same for each of us today: Not help us in our futile plans. Not help us get into the water. He wants to heal us totally in all areas of our lives.

The Heavenly Father wants you to be whole TODAY; restored to what God originally intended for you; through receiving the work done on the cross by Jesus

This healing is based upon what Jesus ALREADY did not your efforts! There was a very real debt to be paid and Jesus paid it with His death, burial, and resurrection.

Q: Have you given your life to Jesus Christ as Savior and Lord?
     Have you been transformed by the power of the Spirit of God?

At this moment, you can bow your head and say, “God, be merciful to me a sinner!” (He will hear that simple prayer).

You can do this right now by praying in your own words like this:
·        Ask Jesus to forgive you for your sins
·        Ask Jesus to take His rightful place as LORD & SAVIOR
·        And then turn away from whatever the Bible says is sin.
·        This is only possible after Christ has come to live inside of you.

And the Spirit of God will come into your heart and will enable you to stop trusting in your own efforts to please God and begin to trust in what Jesus Christ has already done.

The Healer is here today- His Name is JESUS

We read in John 5:6 that when Jesus passed by the pool, the man was too filled with discouragement to see Jesus. He was too focused on being frustrated because no one helped him. This man almost missed seeing the only One who could heal him.

Some of you are in that same position today. Do you see Him here? Or are you simply struggling to get into the water and mad that no one will help you in?

The Healer is here today- His Name is JESUS

Do you hear Him calling out to you? Or are you waiting for an angel to come instead? Or are you mad because others have gone ahead of you?

Jesus is asking each one of us the same question today: “DO YOU WANT TO BE MADE WELL?” Physically, Emotionally, Spiritually…
 
Why would Jesus ask that? Of course we want to be made well; after all, we’ve been coming to church for years!

The Healer is here today- His Name is JESUS! How will you respond to his question that He is asking to you? Will you respond with excuses? My family has always struggled with this…It’s our generational thing…

Or Will you respond by rising up, taking up your bed and receiving your healing?

IT’S REALLY UP TO YOU…. But you will need to respond to the question that Jesus is asking…


Oct 4, 2018

Shaming Shame


We all have experienced shame; it is a basic part of being human.

But how we deal with it makes a HUGE difference.

Shame is different from guilt. We feel guilty for what we do. We feel ashamed of who we are.

Shame is fear-based and drives us to want to hide or protect ourselves from scrutiny. It is hardly ever a helpful or motivating emotion.

Shame is the discomfort experienced when we don’t live up to the expectations of others. It is a sense of worthlessness or inadequacy.

Shame is the remorse and/or embarrassment experienced when we perceive that we have let others down or when we expect (or receive) their scorn or ridicule.

Shame has to do with self-disapproval and it can be very powerful and VERY destructive.

Shame is about embarrassment, humiliation, feeling of low value and above all, powerlessness.

Shame tends to make us feel alone and outside society. It is dangerous psychologically, emotionally, and spiritually.

And, unless we deal with our shame, it accumulates and begins to weigh us down and it will block us from fully experience the LIFE that Jesus brings.

Jeremiah 3:25 “We lie down in our shame, and our reproach covers us. For we have sinned against the LORD our God, We and our fathers, from our youth even to this day, and have not obeyed the voice of the LORD our God."

It is useless to try and hide our sins
God wants to deal with it, ALL OF IT!
God knows that damning effect sin and SHAME have in our lives.

God wants a relationship with you, as a son or daughter…Come to the LORD as soon as you sin; not just when shame or guilt overwhelms you.

God doesn’t want us to be like trained animals—like robots. He wants fellowship with those who come to Him through choice in response to His love and faithfulness.

God gives pretty simple instruction: “If you want sorrow, then be wicked”.

The wicked will reap the consequences of their actions. In their rejection of God’s plan will find no comfort or relief. They can expect sorrow/pain/anguish and no relief from their shame. This is NOT how God wants us to live!

Pretty simple instruction: “If you want mercy, then trust in the Lord”

Those who trust in the Lord can always expect to experience God’s mercy (kindness, favor) to carry them through to a place of deliverance.

Look to God to deliver you. Look to God for forgiveness. Look to God for freedom from shame. This is how God wants us to live!

“For He made Him who knew no sin to be sin for us, that we might become the righteousness of God in Him.” ( 2 Corinthians 5:21)

God gave us a way to bring our sins to Him--and to go away forgiven. But we have to come clean 100 percent before God.  And then, we have to face the consequences of our sin.

God never rejects anyone who comes to Him with true repentance and a desire for restored fellowship.

“Instead of your shame you shall have double honor, and instead of confusion they shall rejoice in their portion. Therefore, in their land they shall possess double; Everlasting joy shall be theirs.” (Isaiah 61:7)

God will convict you of sin that you need to confess. But Satan will accuse you of sin God has already forgiven. Shame comes from the enemy, not God! Your sin is none of the enemy’s business- Jesus paid it all!


“Therefore I will look to the LORD; I will wait for the God of my salvation;
My God will hear me. 8 Do not rejoice over me, my enemy; when I fall, I will arise; when I sit in darkness, The LORD will be a light to me. 9 I will bear the indignation of the LORD, because I have sinned against Him, Until He pleads my case and executes justice for me. He will bring me forth to the light; I will see His righteousness. 10 Then she who is my enemy will see, and shame will cover her who said to me, “Where is the LORD your God?”  My eyes will see her; now she will be trampled down like mud in the streets. (Micah 7:7-10 (emphasis by me)


We need to let Jesus come to us like He did to the men and women who were in such despair and hopelessness. We need to let Jesus bring hope in way that ONLY He can bring it; through His Word (the Bible), through worship of Him, through spending time with Him.

And because of His death and resurrection ALL who ask can have new life!
 “For the love of Christ compels us, because we judge thus: that if One died for all, then all died; and He died for all, that those who live should live no longer for themselves, but for Him who died for them and rose again. (2 Corinthians 5:14-15)

Need further help? Someone is waiting to talk with you. Call either:
1-888-NEED HIM or 1-877-2GRAHAM (1-877-247-2426).

All Scripture taken from the New King James Version®. Copyright © 1982 by Thomas Nelson. Used by permission. All rights reserved.